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how to love yourself

How To Love Yourself The Greatest Love Is Absolute Self Love

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Love is one of the greatest feelings that this universe has bestowed upon us.

Love for our family, our bf/gf, friends, pets, but we forget the most important love of all, self-love.

You can’t truly love someone unless you truly love yourself; I wholeheartedly do believe in that very much.

These 5 fundamental tips will open the way on how to love yourself more than you can ever imagine:

  1. You must be selfish.
  2. Accept who you are.
  3. Take care of your body.
  4. Take care of your mind.
  5. Practice self-complements.

How To Love Yourself The Greatest Love Is Absolute Self Love

how to love yourself

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Love is universal. Without it, life wouldn’t have much meaning; to some, a life without love would be meaningless and not even worth living.

There are 3 kinds of love.
The first being loved by someone. The second is loving someone. And the third is self-love, which I believe is the most important.

Life can be rough, especially if you’ve never had a bf/gf, sex, intimate relationships, and have social anxiety or you’re not self-conscious about yourself. Take it from me, I’m almost 27 years old and I just experienced some of these and was able to gain the confidence in myself to go out and meet someone but for 26 years I never truly loved anyone until I learned how to actually love myself first. We will expand on the 5 tips above to aid you in whatever it is your heart so desires in this life that’s fill with full of love, starting with you.

1. You Must Be Selfish

Being selfish is the very first step on how to love yourself.

It’s not bad, in fact being selfish will get you far in life. 

being selfish is good

1.1 A Tough Life Lesson

In my teens and early adulthood, I was that “nice” person. Always helping people: gave money to people without much hesitation: did favors and offer my time to them. That lasted for quite some time.

Foolish and ignorant as I was, I honestly believed I could change people but the cold reality is, people won’t change just because you did a few favors/things for them. A killer will remain a killer, a thief will remain a thief, and so on until something super drastic happens in their life or until they are locked away. Anyways, I stopped giving my money away, helping people, and doing favors altogether. (I still help people as much as I can but wisely and in a way, I don’t lose anything).

People take kindness as a weakness and will use that to their advantage, BELIEVE ME. I’ve personally experienced this not once, twice, but at least 7 times!

Lesson here? Stop letting your emotions drive you. Don’t give anyone your hard earned money; you can offer food, water, your service and support, volunteer, favors but never ever money. If you do then don’t expect them to return the favor!

1.2 Where Is Your Energy

benefits of meditation

Here’s the thing about energy. The universe and we are made up of energy. When you focus time and energy on others and things, you leave less or none for yourself.

Therefore you can’t grow or mature like someone who gives all their time and energy to themselves. Do you think successful and wealthy people actually go out of their way to help people? Some do and some don’t, but if they do, they know for sure they aren’t going to lose time, money, and resource.

Take all the energy you possess and refocus it on yourself. 

Quit worrying about little things that have no significant meanings to your life or goals.

Is there something you must have in this life? Money, fame, girls/guys, cars, etc. Then go for it, the only thing or person hindering your progress is you!

There are billions of people suffering in this world at any given moment. Unfortunately, they are the unfortunate ones but eating the 32-ounce steak in front of you isn’t going to solve world hunger nor make money rain from the heavens. Do whatever the hey you want in this life because you have one life and it’s not worth the time, effort, and energy to be worrying about others.

Just make sure you don’t hurt anyone else for your own selfish ways.

As you focus and devote more time and energy unto yourself, expect these great things to manifest:

  • Learn more about yourself
  • Get more work done
  • Reach your dreams and goals faster
  • Care more about yourself
  • Be grateful for who you are
  • Be thankful for what you have and don’t have
  • And then eventually you will become so great that you will want to help others
Key Take Away
Once you have become successful and have the life you dream of, then do help and educate the less fortunate.

2. Accept Who You Are

2.1 Better Now Than Never

accept who you are

I’m going to state the obvious but not everyone was born the way they had hoped. And probably the majority of us want to alter at least one thing about ourselves whether mentally or physically.

For almost 13-14 years, my stature and mentally sicken and disgusted me. I was shorter than most of my peers and I still am, my face was covered in acne and red spots and I’m left with red spots, noticeably large pores, and indented + pitted acne scars on my face, my nose isn’t the most beautiful nose, and I was born with ichthyosis on my legs and arms.

World Bank states that 15% of the world population are born with a mental or physical disability. At least for me, I didn’t have any disabilities, no I possessed something far worst.

Pure, infinite, and a vast amount of negativity.
Living that way for 14 years became a burden not only to myself but everyone around me.

If you can walk, talk, see, hear, use the computer, and so forth then you are extremely fortunate. The more we want something that we can’t have, the more miserable we become. I notice that just from experience only: nowadays, I travel the world so all my belongings fit in 2 luggage. Do you think I can fit a car, stereo, TV, and whatever it is that people so desire these days?

I’ve learned to appreciate not only what I have but also what I don’t have and to make the what I have stand out more rather than focus on people who are more attractive or have more things than me.

To be honest, having more can make one even more miserable as opposed to someone who has little or nothing. I have already truly appreciated myself, health, this life, and the bright future that I will write for myself, but of course, this took time to realize.

More people, more stuff, more work just means more problems and less focus on you. Let go of any problems you are currently dealing with and all negativity. 14 years I lived that life, so much wasted and lost time, don’t walk the same path that I once did.

Nothing good happened to me. I was miserable existing, I wasn’t living! Eventually, I had to surrender to myself both mentally and physically, appreciate my outer appearance, and that look to the bright side of everything. Well as the few years flew by, I felt transformed and anew, the painful past was no more.

2.2 Change For the Better

Whether by fate or coincide, what changed me was a roommate of mine. (Let’s just say their name was Taylor) Taylor was always complaining, cussing, making excuses for everything, didn’t have a stable job, always negative, and so forth. Taylor ate and drank very unhealthily, communicated foully to Taylor’s own young kids, never paid the rent on time, dirty and lived like a bum almost.

Even though Taylor was my roommate for a year, after 6 months of living with such a person, I grew tired and realize just how awful being negative was. I was sure Taylor didn’t even care about him/herself just by his/her actions.  Taylor was exactly like me but WORSE! That person was over 50 years old and I was 25 years old. If I had not changed that day then 25 years later would I have become like Taylor?

And here I thought I was negative and miserable if so then Taylor must have been the God of negativity and misery! There’s always someone who has it better or worse than you.

I couldn’t accept myself anymore and how toxic my way of living was. If you are going through the same situation like I once did, then please change for the better. Life will not only be much easier but have more meaning and joy.

Key Take Away
If you know that you are harming yourself by hurting your body and mind physically or mentally then change today. The longer you wait the worst it becomes and maybe an opportunity like this won’t present itself again because you decided to procrastinate. 
 Learn more about procrastination.

3. Take care of your body.

3.1 Eat Good, Exercise Good, Feel Good

You are what you eat. Junk food, process meats, sugar, salt, simple carbohydrates, and so on taste delicious and makes you feel happy. If you eat these foods all the time, of course, you will gain weight, age faster, feel tire and grumpy, develop illness and some type of cancer, and so on.

Feeding your body with healthy foods like vegetables, fruits, nuts, oils, and so forth will make your body look good, feel good, have more energy, feel alive and want to move and go out. If you have some sort of physical or mental illness that can be fixed yet you are too lazy or uneducated to fix the issue, then is that not your own fault?

The internet is so vast, you can literally find the answer to any question. If the problem or issue can’t be fix then accept it and move on.

You already have the problem and live with it, may as well use it to your advantage rather than think about the problem and be miserable all day.

Not enough time to work out? 20-30 minutes of intense exercise 4-6 times a week is better than 45-90 minutes of medium exercise 3-5 times a week. Working out makes you feel good. It release stress, gets you in shape, improves your immune system, makes you confidence, makes you more attractive, and so on. When you work and put in the effort for the body that you have, you will feel good about yourself and will be more attracted to yourself.

When you accomplish a goal or a big task, don’t you feel like you can move mountains? Do the same but for you, make goals about your body or about you and fix it for the better. Do overweight people actually feel and look better than fit people? If they do then more power to them because it really only matters if you care, but a person that’s in shape will more than likely feel better than someone not.

3.2 One Body, One Life

Society frowns upon tattoos, piercing, dye hair, irregular clothing style, and many other things. There are rules that we have to follow as a society but if society is holding you back from happiness, and doing what you want to yourself, then don’t pay attention to society. If you want to have plastic surgery, dye your hair blue and yellow, crossdress, or be covered in ink then that’s your choice.

If they can’t appreciate you at your best then they won’t be able to handle you at your worst. You have one life to do whatever makes you feel, you. Don’t let anyone take that away from you! Be you; there’s no greater feeling than being yourself.

Numerous things require money and the bigger the dream the more work and money is required, so plan out your life according. If you want riches, fame, power, and the big life; then you have to put more work and effort. If you want a simple, humble, comfortable, and little life; then you don’t need to do anything because even the poorest can achieve that.

Key Take Away
So live and look however you want and make sure that the only person who cares about how you look is you. Living a healthy lifestyle will make life even more enjoyable.

4. Take Care of Your Mind.

4.1 Power Of Meditation

how to meditate

A healthy body produces a healthy mind and that’s a fact! Your mind is like a garden, what you sow you shall reap. So only plant positivity and encouraging words and thoughts into your mind. If you would like to have a great and healthy mind, then study and practice meditation daily.

Meditation has almost an infinite amount of benefits and absolutely no negative side effects.

Meditating on how to love yourself will help wonders. Believe, feel, and visualize on how great and wonderful you are. Feel the chill running up and down your spine and awaken those goosebumps. This feeling is healthy and feels great, especially if you can do it at will.

Meditation has been known to improve so much physically and mentally both for the body and mind. Meditation allows one to connect within and improve oneself thus one will eventually understand and love oneself (or love yourself more). It is one of if not the best way to understand and appreciate yourself which will ultimately lead to self-love if you haven’t found self-love yet.

4.2 The Greatest Weapon

Your mind is one of the most powerful weapons in the world. I don’t think you know how truly powerful your mind can be, it is the controller of your every action and thoughts. It has the power to make you happy, sad, angry, violent, etc. in a snap of a finger.

Don’t you wish you can be happy, excited, loving, etc. all the time?

You can if you know how to master your mind. When you are the master of your mind and you tell it what to do and when to do it, I promise you will see and experience new and amazing things. There is another world beyond this physical world that lies dormant inside our minds. (If you want to know about it then search “opening the third eye”.)

Your brain tells you it wants you to smoke cigarettes, eat junk food, and drink coffee every day because you have wired it through habitual actions. When that feeling, dopamine is released (just a little, but a little x 10,000 is a lot!) it’s quite difficult to quit feeling good habits because dopamine gives you pleasure and you can’t stop craving that pleasurable feeling. Meditation and focus will help to control this type of behavior that many of us fall prey too. Practice resistance and control your bad addictions.

This may be one of the most difficult journeys you walk, most will falter but those who are victorious shall know what true freedom taste like.
Key Take Away
Of course it takes time, maybe 1-50 years, but little progress is better than none at all, and what matters is that you try and don’t give up.

5. Practice You

5.1 Give Yourself Compliments Every day

complement yourself

Every house has 1 or 50 mirrors. Each time you pass the mirror, look and give yourself a few compliments. Each morning and evening you have a good 5-10 minutes of brushing your teeth, washing your face, shaving, putting on cremes and lotion. Use this time to tell yourself aloud (this way is better) or in your mind positive things, or even things that you dream of or goals you aspire to reach. You can say things like, “You look good”, “You are an amazing person”, “You can do it”, etc. It may sound corny but believe me, the power of subconscious words and thoughts have infinite powers.

There is this amazing book called The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale. You may want to check it out. In short, daily actions and thoughts of certain actions will become habitual. Try complimenting yourself for a few months and see how your life will be altered!

5.2 Give Time To Yourself Each Day

The absolute best time spend is none other than you time.

Each day you must give yourself 10-60 minutes on improving yourself or working on yourself.

That includes: exercising, meditating, improving on a problem you have, learning new things, and anything that can and will make you a better person as a whole. You’ll be surprised on how little things over time can grow exponentially! Do this every day, ENJOY the moment, and results shall come.

When the most difficult time comes and it will come and no one is there for you, who will lift you out of darkness? That one is, you. Don’t depend on others and other’s surely don’t depend on you.

Love and accept yourself so you enjoy every single waking moment of life and live how you so please.

Someone who loves them-self will endure more and venture farther than someone who doesn’t. You truly are your own best friend; no one really knows you more than you do yourself. Each person you meet will know you differently from another person but only you can know who you truly are, or do you? If you don’t then it’s time to put this guide into practice.

Key Take Away
As unbelievable as it sounds; you can always learn more about yourself and improve. In order to do so you will have to give time to yourself each day. Make you the best you that you can. 
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